Monday, February 6, 2012

Kiss Gun

J is a boy. All boy. And so he is going through the phase that all boys seem to go through in their journey to manhood.

He thinks kissing is gross.

He complains that all movies are kissing movies. And he groans loudly, "Eeeeewwww!" whenever a kissing scene surfaces. Which quite effectively destroys any feelings of romance that might otherwise be generated by watching kissing scenes in movies.

Being a boy, he also likes to build things. Particularly weapons. He has a set of trio blocks that make very interesting looking guns. Over the weekend, he built a sleep gun. When he pointed it at anyone, they were instructed to promptly fall asleep. It only worked about half the time. Unless he was aiming at me, when it worked much more often since I was passed out on the rocking chair trying to enjoy a little snooze time.

But somewhere in the middle of movie night, he decided to change his gun into a kiss gun. The movie did seem to have a larger than average number of kissing scenes.

So he retrieved his calculator, set it on his gun, and proceeded to push random buttons in order to "program" it as a kiss gun.

Then he took aim. And fired. Two shots, one for the kisser, one for the kissee. And he took great delight in watching us all succumb to the power of his kiss gun. Shaggy and I kissed loads of times. K & S tried to hide under blankets, but were dug out and thoroughly kissed. Baby B was delighted by all the attention and went around making smooching sounds at everyone. R played along wonderfully well, as always.

And during our whole hour long smooching session, J didn't utter a single Eeeeeeeewwww. Except once, when I grabbed his gun, fired at him and planted a big fat kiss on his forehead. He wiped it off in disgust and went back to shooting at everyone else.

Next, he says he's going to program his gun to be a chore gun, to make everyone do their chores. I'm holding my breath that it will work even better than the kiss gun.


kara said...

Why do you make your kids watch so many kissing movies? What kind of household are you running?

Mom said...

I agree - he's definitely all boy and kissing is gross when you're seven. But tell him I have a better suggestion for his chore gun. He should program it so his siblings do HIS chores, along with their own. :-) Do you remember the elf game from when you were little?